June 14th, 2008
But Doesn’t Everybody Cry in Supermarkets?
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‘Why We Buy: The Science Of Shopping‘ by Paco Underhill is one of my all time favorite books on marketing, but it is a misnomer — most of the book is about ‘how’ we buy instead of ‘why’. Here’s a rare excerpt from page 96 of ‘Why We Buy‘ that does talk about why —
Shopping means different things to different people at different times. We use shopping as therapy, reward, bribery, pastime, as an excuse to get out of the house, as a way to troll for potential loved ones, as entertainment, as a form of education or even worship, as a way to kill time. There are compulsive shoppers doing serious damage to their bank accounts and credit rating who use shopping as a cry for help. (Then they shop around for twelve step programs.) And how many disreputable public figures end up arrested for shoplifting small, inexpensive items?
It was in a supermarket that I, too, had an emotionally cathartic shopping experience. This was maybe fifteen years ago, a time when it began to seem as though Envirosell might succeed as an ongoing concern. Up until that point, though, it was an open question — I was borderline broke all the time. Anyways… on that day… (in) the Pathmark supermarket… in New York City… standing in the imported goods aisle, it suddenly hit me that I could afford to buy anything there if I wanted… heedless of the fact that it costs maybe four or five bucks. I no longer had to sweat over my food budget, I realized, and at that moment I began to cry. Right there in front of all those imported jellies, jams and preserves.
But doesn’t everybody cry in supermarkets?
I haven’t (yet) cried in a retail store, but I could have, on more occasion than one, because I could afford to buy anything there if I wanted, for the first time. It’s a wonderful feeling to be able to afford what you want, especially for a man —
Eighty six percent of women look at price tags when they shop. Only seventy two percent of men do. For a man, ignoring the price tag is almost a measure of his virility. (page 99)
The man almost always pays. Especially when a man and woman are shopping together, he insists on whipping out his wad and forking it over… No wonder retailers commonly call men wallet carriers. Or why the conventional wisdom is sell to the woman, close to the man. Because while the man may not love the experience of shopping, he gets a definite thrill from the experience of paying. It allows him to feel in charge even when he isn’t. (page 101)
However, being able to buy everything is one thing, actually buying everything is another. The important question is — what do you do after you know you can afford it? Do you buy it, because you can? Or, do you ask yourself if you really need to buy it, to begin with?
After years of buying things because I could (finally) afford to pay for them, I have learned two lessons. One, there will always be things I won’t be able to afford and, two, I don’t need to buy things only because I can.
But, what about you? Have you ever cried in a supermarket?
