Tag Archives: Bombay

The Beginners Guide To Zero Dollar Dating In Bombay

You’ll recall that, ever since I have gone off consumption, the number one question I have been asking myself is: what can you do on a date when you are off consumption?

Friends, readers, well-wishers: I’m delighted to tell you that, in spite of my fear that my year of abstinence may spread to more areas of my life than I had planned for, I had two perfect zero dollar dates last week.

The first date was on Thursday, when she came over to my house in the middle of the night and stayed till the wee hours of the morning. As you can imagine, we didn’t spend much money, and the taxi fare to her home and back at five in the morning can be safely passed off as a necessity.

The second date was on Sunday evening, when we went for a walk on Juhu beach. In spite of living in Bombay for many years, neither of us had been to Juhu beach on a Sunday evening before, and we were shocked by the sea… of humanity! The main stretch of Juhu beach was a mind-numbing mela (carnival), with tens of thousands of people clustered around hundreds of snacks stands and dozens of rides for children.

My Insatiable Craving For McDonald’s Paneer Salsa Wrap

McDonald's Paneer Salsa Wrap

I have a confession to make.

I have an insatiable craving for McDonald’s Paneer Salsa Wrap.

It hits me at the oddest times and places, more often than I would like to admit.

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Sometimes, I’m running on Marine Drive and, suddenly, my stomach ties up into knots and all I can think of is a McDonald’s Paneer Salsa Wrap.

I have to stop, bend over, take a few deep breaths, look out over the sea towards Malabar Hills, wait for the craving to slowly subside.

Sometimes, when I can’t control the craving, I get into a taxi and go over to the McDonald’s outlet in Colaba and get myself one (or two) at 463 kCal apiece.

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Sometimes, I’m kissing a woman and my mouth goes all wet and dribbley and all I can think of is a McDonald’s Paneer Salsa Wrap.

Some women notice, others don’t, but every time it happens, I know exactly what has triggered it.

Some women like wet kisses, others don’t, so, the reaction varies; I don’t think it has been a deal-breaker so far.